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 So Robby leaves soon....

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Navygirlfriend007
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PostSubject: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 3:52 pm

I just got back from seeing Robby yesterday and I am just really upset that he is going to be leaving soon. I hit a low point while I was there with him and now I am not sure I want to go to the Navy... I am just so hurt and he doesn't seem to notice. Before things were really well and then we had a little wedding thing where we were going to get married but now we aren't for a while and I just don't know what to do anymore because I am just so lost and upset. 😢

I am just so upset and I don't know what to do because on top of being sad I am sick....I got sick while I was there and I guess I just haven't gotten better. 😢
What should I do? Should I talk with him about how I feel while he is thinking about deploying? Or do I keep it to myself and brew over it?
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UncleSamWifey
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 3:56 pm

I'd talk to him about it.

Yes it may add more stress...but he will (hopefully) notice something is up.And honestly, it'll eat you up inside if you don't discuss it with him.

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Navygirlfriend007
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 6:54 pm

I just don't know what to do....he might think its just me being sick and just getting home yesterday after spending a lot of time together and then going from hearing from him all the time to not being able too after he leaves and I don't know how to voice whats going on...things got so crazy while I was there and his mom caused some drama and I just don't know myself anymore.... I am lost and not sure what to do...
My mom keeps nagging me and when I try to talk with her all she does is make me feel awful about myself and yet she says that she cares I don't think that she does because all she does is throw stuff at me like how I fell in love with Robby and how all he wants from me is sex and now that hes gotten it he doesn't want me which I know is not true because hes not like that at all.
Life sucks...I don't know what to do anymore 😢
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ASailorsKiss
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 7:03 pm

First of all, you need to surround yourself with people who are are a positive influence on you. Nothing against your mother, however....she doesn't seem to have the greatest of communication skills...and that's alright. This can't be the first time she has reacted and come at you like that with those awful things she says. So, if you keep doing what you are doing, you will keep getting what you are getting. Love your mom, but accept that she is not one that you can really count on for unconditional support at this time...but that doesn't mean she won't be capable of it later. You are the one in control of that, because you sought her out. As far as Robby, you need to express to him how you are feeling...it will truly eat you up inside...and he might not be aware of whats going on in your mind...men and women think so differently. You need to honest and forthright and tell him your feelings...tell him "I'm not sure how to bring this up but some things have been weighing on my mind and I would like to talk about them...." But whatever you do, do not bring into the conversation what your mother said. Also keep in mind that he is going through a time, too...and maybe he is dealing with things he doesn't quite know how to deal with. Just keep an open mind and open heart....its never good to keep it inside. Be well. Karen
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Navygirlfriend007
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 7:47 pm

Robby knows what my mom says because she has said it to both of us before and she does it often. Also my mom doesn't like his mom and he knows that too because she has said things to both of us and often enough that he knows when I am upset about it. I just wish I could afford to live on my own but getting a job here isn't easy and even a small apartment is expensive....

I dunno whats going on anymore and right now Robby is on his way back to where hes stationed....so I cant talk with him until tonight when he calls me...
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 8:24 pm

Girl, its all in your hands...all of it, but you just don't see it. You will counter with every bit of advice given with another reason why you feel doomed to fail. Your thinking negatively about everything isn't going to help your life change or become better until you take a step out of the situation and analyze it from another view and plan...don't think about all the things wrong...you already know what they are...make a plan on how to make things right or better. Then put that plan into action. It seems that you believe everything is hopeless....hopefully I am wrong. Be well.
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Navygirlfriend007
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Tue Aug 19, 2008 8:52 pm

I am going to try and voice whats going on with me.... I am sorry just things are getting really stressful and I don't mean to counter any help given. I am more worried about Robby leaving this time it being our 2nd deployment and I don't want him to be worried about me while he is leaving but then again I don't want him to leave without knowing whats going on. I should have told him while I was there but I was more worried about messing up his pre deployment leave with tears and fights...we had a tiny fight while I was there about him leaving and me getting stressed about leaving for the Navy. I should have told him then that I was scared and didn't know how to handle it but instead I let it go which I shouldn't have but I hate fighting with him.

I know that things are going to be different this time with him not being able to tell me whats going on and last time I knew where he was but this time I wont and I think thats what might have caused the fight. I am going to talk with him tonight and try and explain whats going on and that its not because I just got home and got into a fight with my parents, so I can only hope that it works out the way I hope that it does because I don't want to fight with him when hes just gotten back from seeing his mom,me and his family for 2 weeks. I guess if it causes a fight then we can take it from there and try and talk in a calm way and be mature about this whole thing.
:| its all going to depend on how I bring it up and talk about it, its already eating at me but hes on a plane going back so I just have to wait and know that he loves me and will no matter what I talk about good or bad.
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Wed Aug 20, 2008 11:36 pm

you have to have honest communication if you want your relationship to work out for the long haul.
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PostSubject: Re: So Robby leaves soon....   Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:08 pm

**Hugs** Im sorry hun i would talk to him. Tell him how you feel and what you what him to know.

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