my idiot stb exdh *update*

So it turns out that my stb ex dh has finally made the move to MO and his girlfriend, whatever, she'll soon realize he has issues. But he still owes me lots of money, like over 1000 for just current bills, and no he's not ad so I don't get BAH or anything. so we're emailing back and forth last night and here's the convo...

the first thing was a myspace message from him saying the new plate for the car will be sent to me and after he already wanted me to get his things and store them...

"Mary Sheider
to ricky

thank you, what are you going to do about your things? so far it's your pics, your confed flags, tv stand, 2 bar stools. Are you even still in the state or did you go already. if you left i can meet your dad at the apt. if need be.

ricky sheider
to me

Can you meet my dad at the apt.?


Mary Sheider
to ricky

depends on when, why can't you come?



ricky sheider
to me

I will get in touch with my dad and find out when he could come down there



Mary Sheider
to ricky

why were are you? Anyway, just give him my email and we'll work something out. I'll also need to turn in your key. what about all the money you owe me? 200 for kohls, and then half of 1500 and 700.


ricky sheider
to me

700 for what?


Mary Sheider
to ricky

rent, late fees, eviction processing fees, despite us getting evicted, we still owe all that money and it's just going to go to collection unless we pay it.


ricky sheider
to mary

I will agree to pay you $750 for half of the lease agreement. How come you didn't pay anything for August rent? Why did you let it get this far? You wanted the apartment and just to make matters difficult you move out because you can not afford the apt. I have given you my car and the apt. Like I said I will pay you the $750 for half and after that your on your own.


Mary Sheider
to ricky

You knew I didn't have any money and I paid for most of the rent at the last place, plus I paid for the first month at this place. It doesn't matter anymore ricky, I'll just have the lawyer deal with it. It's you that let it get this far, not me, if you hadnt cheated and moved out we never would've been concerned with who's paying what. Just remember that both our names are on this and so we're both going to suffer on our credit, but I have an excuse you don't, you left me, you cheated on me. I don't want to argue about htis anymore, at least you're willing to help pay for something. I hope you're happy and healthy and I hope you're getting your life together, hopefully we can put an end to this soon and we'll never have to communicate again.


What do you guys think I should do, do you think I have enough for court with everything else? I really hate this I'm not this type of person, but he's forcing me to be a person I'm not. I cried myself to sleep last night and was having a hard time breathing again. At one point to get myself to sleep I was singing jesus loves me lol

Don't know how to help with the situation.......
but man does he sound just like my ex husband lol
Hope it gets a little easier for you I am sorry you have to go through all this

wow he sounds like a lot of ex husbands lol, i guess that's why he'll be an ex husband lol

i dont think you should rely on him for anything...

yeah, I've stopped and already come to the conclusion I'll be paying everything myself, as usual. I just hate that he gets off free and clear right now and I'm stuck here with no money (he has a few thousand in the bank, while I have anywhere from -70 to 200) and my credit, which I had been working hard on since my college days of screwing up, is being shot to bits and I'm screwing people over when I hate other people suffering because of me. I just can't wait for this to be over, though i know it hasn't even really started yet. I tried calling a lawyer friday, but evidently my voicemail wasn't set up yet so he couldn't leave a message, so I guess I'll try again tomorrow. I almost hope he gets some type of std from all of this, but I know I shouldn't think like that, especially as a christian, so I pray everyday for God to bless him and give him wisdom to know what's right and to do the right thing, though that simple prayer takes a while to get out. well thanks ladies for all your support through this drama road, i'm sure there'll be more up ahead. lol

well what state did you two get married in?! i know that matters if its not a no fault state then you should be okay..

you need to get a copy of ALL the bills and have them ready for court.. you also need to print out all the emails...

if its not a no fauilt state everything will be on him because he is cheating.. i'd go to the military and tell them he cheated... he can get in ALOT of trouble... he could actually go to jail for cheating and being in the military... it all just depends on how far you take it.. so id threaten him to get your money!!! be like well if you agree to pay everything you owe then i will not take you cheating to the military... but if you dont then i will just have to do what i need to do. and if once again if you didnt marry in a no fault state you will get alimony!!!

i know everything you need to know about this situation.. so if you ever need any help or questions...

you can give me a call... ill PM you my number

we were married and reside, well i still do and i'm sure his license still is in SC so they have the cheating at fault stuff. Can I just say at this point I almost wish I could just sign a paper and be done with it, with him, i just want to be happy and move on.

yah you can say that...its totally understandable!

You'll be fine sweetie. Have faith. Just remember. We all reap what we sew. Karma is a bitch. His will eventually catch up with him. Good things are coming your way. Not so good things will come his way. Just keep positive and do what you know you have to do to take care of yourself and you will be just fine. You'll find the happiness you're searching for and deserve. <<hugs>> IM me if you ever need someone to talk to and I'll give you my # or leave me your #. I'm willing to listen if you need it. :)

So new update... earlier in the week he wrote me saying he wants to talk to me (I won't give him my number) and that he's sorry things hven't turned out the way they should have and that he'll always love me. I worte back saying you should be sorry, though i doubt you are, and I don't think you know what real love is. Well over the last two days he's called my mom's house looking for me! :lol: First my bro answered and let him have it, he said " I hear you left sissy?" and ricky said" yeah we had some problems" then my brother told him that he left me without any money and he had the nerve to say I had plenty of money! then my brother said that he heard he had a girlfriend and he then had the nerve to deny it! well then he asked my brother for my number which of course my brother doesn't have but told ricky he could call back later but not after ten b/c they have a 10pm rule (my mom doesn't answer the phone after 10 so she can do devos). Well he didn't call back that night, but he called back yesterday and my mom let him have it in her own way. he even had the nerve to say part of the problem was this north south crap his mother like to pull out of her butt. My mom got him there lol. He also said that he "wants to talk to his wife!" at which point my mom said sorry i'm not allowed to give out her number and I don't tell her what to do, she's over 21 and can do whatever she wants, i may tell her my opinion, but i don't get involved (stating this b/c she knows how uber involved and controlling his mom is) lol so it was a funny couple of days. I then wrote him asking why he wants to talk to me so bad and he made his bed so now he has to lie in it. truthfully i'm afraid of talking to him... I'm afraid I'll fall right back in and be dumb.

woo hoo! yay for your family! im so glad they stuck up for you and told him what was up! and good for you for knowing that you might not be strong enough to talk to him.

Dang...

Don't give in!!!!

Don't give in!!!

9 times outta 10 they'll prove theyre a douche again.

I redated my ex from 5 years before meeting DH...and you know what? Asshole did the same shit.Said he was too busy to call me (uh...he worked for the railroad in Richmond,and traveled around the state...wasn't a cop,EMT,firefighter or military...),so he never called.Finally,he was like eh...this isn't working.Shame a month earlier he spilled his guts in such an amazing Oscar winning performance on how he loved me,and I was the "one." Apparently,not so much.

yah if theyre not good enough to know how lucky they are to have you right then and there, theyre not good enough to have you! it shouldnt take "losing" you for them to figure out they love you or you are the one or whatever.

thanks ladies, I don't know if it's God or me, but I'm willing to give him 5 min, at my time, to say his piece, he still won't have my number thank god. Church was all about how failures can become miracles and we need to take risks for god and whatnot, love god, love church, but it's hard when things aren't straightforward.

Good for you! I'm proud of you for sticking to your guns. It takes a lot of strength to know what your weaknesses are and to not expose them. That's wonderful that your family stood up to him like that for you and especially how your mom told him how she doesn't telll you what to do and how to do it. That was great. Considering how much of a mamma's boy he is and how he lets his mother control him. LOL! Your mom let him know that you're an adult who can stand on her own 2 feet and make her own decisions where he is still a child who still relies on his mommy to tell him what to do and when to do it. He probably even calls her when he has to take a dump so she can praise him for using the big boy potty and remind him to wipe from front to back. LOL!!!

Good luck with everything hope it all gets worked out soon!